DO IT YOURSELF OIL CHANGE ALMOST GONE BAD...

spizzi · 10-07-2003, 06:59 PM

You guys might appreciate my story...

So I've decided to start doing my own oil changes on my new car. I purchased Rhino ramps, oil filter, oil, oil filter wrench, a funnel, a creeper (to lay on and roll around) and an oil bucket.

Here's my story:

I drive the car up on the ramps in my garage. The underside of the car has this aerodynamic cap on it that I had to remove... so I was a little frustrated with this. I roll around and try to find all the screws to take this cap off. This takes 20 minutes with a flash light. Once the cover is off, I can't seem to find the oil pan bolt and there seems to be two canisters that look like they could be the oil filter. So I take a guess. Surprise, it works. I start to unscrew the oil pan bolt and position the oil bucket to catch the oil. Little did I know the oil was going to shoot 10 feet beyond the bucket. So I've got a full on Exxon Valdez oil spill in my garage. And that $hit was hott, I started getting burned. So I've got oil on my arm and face. It really sucked. Finally, I get the bucket in place and things are going smooth. I wait another 10 minutes and take off the oil filter and replace the oil pan bolt and install the new oil filter.

Now comes the easy step of putting the cover back on. This took me a good 30 minutes to figure out. It kept falling out of the track and hitting me in the face. Now I'm getting really pissed. Finally, I get it in the tracks and start putting in the screws to keep it in place. The holes are hard to see so I have to use the flashlight. About halfway through the process, the flashlight dies. So I have to get up and run inside to find more batteries.

After getting the cap back on I am faced with the dilemma of pouring the oil in. After putting in about 6 quarts of oil, nothing is showing up on the dipstick. There's no way this car needs more than 6 or 7 quarts of oil, but to show nothing on the dipstick makes me think a ton more oil needs to go in. So I'm thinking nothing is showing up on the dipstick because the car is up on the ramps and tilted at an angle. So I get in the car but I don't start it. I put it into neutral and start rocking the car back and forth to get it off the ramps. At this time, it is important to tell you that NOBODY is home to help me and I'm doing everything in sandals. So I get the car rocking. And I give it one final hard push.

You can only imagine that a car that weighs a few good tons would roll nice and slow down the ramps right? That f###er took off! So I jump in the car and, of course, there is no power since the car isn't on. So I try desperately hard to press the brake down (no power brakes mind you) and I pull the emergency brake. It worked! Not only that, but I was just inches away from ripping off the hood as it would have caught the edge of the house and surely have torn it away. I'm surprised I didn't slip and fall and have the car go past me and into my neighbors house across the street. Seriously. Bad $hit.

That's my story fellas.

Have a good day.

S6_Envy · 10-07-2003, 07:06 PM

meq123 · 10-07-2003, 07:08 PM

spizzi · 10-07-2003, 07:21 PM

rocking it off the ramps. But next time I'll be able to start it after I put a full 7 quarts in.

saabSean · 10-07-2003, 07:27 PM

...but that story is HILARIOUS!!! HAHAHAHAHA

DWP · 10-07-2003, 07:32 PM

the stealer charges $65 or more for that!

Love your sense of humor, man. You are one great story-teller.

CoolerKing · 10-07-2003, 07:37 PM

screwynewy · 10-07-2003, 07:40 PM

Uncle Castro · 10-07-2003, 08:00 PM

I can relate to the Exxon Valdez comment. It seems obvious now, but I had my little $8 oil collector bucket right under the plug, thinking it would flow out like Hershey's syrup. Wrong. It'll be easier next time.

RobertV · 10-07-2003, 08:05 PM

I think we all have stories like that.
I remember I was cleaning my motorcycle when I was in college. I was wearing only shorts and no shoes. I was drinking a few beers...which is required when you clean your bike!
So I go to put the bike on the center stand (it was a Honda NightHawk 750) and it slowly tipped over on the sidewalk. I think I only owned it for about a month and really didn't do much damage, but that was the last time I did it bare foot....never stopped the beers....but I am sure that they really didn't have anything to do with it????? right!!!!
REV

10-07-2003, 06:59 PM	#1
spizzi New Member Account #: 62321 Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 377	DO IT YOURSELF OIL CHANGE ALMOST GONE BAD... You guys might appreciate my story... So I've decided to start doing my own oil changes on my new car. I purchased Rhino ramps, oil filter, oil, oil filter wrench, a funnel, a creeper (to lay on and roll around) and an oil bucket. Here's my story: I drive the car up on the ramps in my garage. The underside of the car has this aerodynamic cap on it that I had to remove... so I was a little frustrated with this. I roll around and try to find all the screws to take this cap off. This takes 20 minutes with a flash light. Once the cover is off, I can't seem to find the oil pan bolt and there seems to be two canisters that look like they could be the oil filter. So I take a guess. Surprise, it works. I start to unscrew the oil pan bolt and position the oil bucket to catch the oil. Little did I know the oil was going to shoot 10 feet beyond the bucket. So I've got a full on Exxon Valdez oil spill in my garage. And that $hit was hott, I started getting burned. So I've got oil on my arm and face. It really sucked. Finally, I get the bucket in place and things are going smooth. I wait another 10 minutes and take off the oil filter and replace the oil pan bolt and install the new oil filter. Now comes the easy step of putting the cover back on. This took me a good 30 minutes to figure out. It kept falling out of the track and hitting me in the face. Now I'm getting really pissed. Finally, I get it in the tracks and start putting in the screws to keep it in place. The holes are hard to see so I have to use the flashlight. About halfway through the process, the flashlight dies. So I have to get up and run inside to find more batteries. After getting the cap back on I am faced with the dilemma of pouring the oil in. After putting in about 6 quarts of oil, nothing is showing up on the dipstick. There's no way this car needs more than 6 or 7 quarts of oil, but to show nothing on the dipstick makes me think a ton more oil needs to go in. So I'm thinking nothing is showing up on the dipstick because the car is up on the ramps and tilted at an angle. So I get in the car but I don't start it. I put it into neutral and start rocking the car back and forth to get it off the ramps. At this time, it is important to tell you that NOBODY is home to help me and I'm doing everything in sandals. So I get the car rocking. And I give it one final hard push. You can only imagine that a car that weighs a few good tons would roll nice and slow down the ramps right? That f###er took off! So I jump in the car and, of course, there is no power since the car isn't on. So I try desperately hard to press the brake down (no power brakes mind you) and I pull the emergency brake. It worked! Not only that, but I was just inches away from ripping off the hood as it would have caught the edge of the house and surely have torn it away. I'm surprised I didn't slip and fall and have the car go past me and into my neighbors house across the street. Seriously. Bad $hit. That's my story fellas. Have a good day.

10-07-2003, 07:06 PM	#2
S6_Envy Junior Member Account #: 14482 Join Date: Jan 2001 Posts: 504	Next time will go easier. First thing you need to do is buy a shop light.

10-07-2003, 07:08 PM	#3
meq123 AudiWorld Senior Member Account #: 47880 Join Date: Dec 2002 Posts: 1,352	So??? Dip the oil register on the dipstick? (We're waiting with baited breath!) __________________ Somewhere in Maryland: 2001 A6 2.7t 6spd - now sold :-(

10-07-2003, 07:21 PM	#4
spizzi New Member Account #: 62321 Join Date: Sep 2003 Posts: 377	yeah it totally will next time. I think the only thing that was a bad decision was rocking it off the ramps. But next time I'll be able to start it after I put a full 7 quarts in.

10-07-2003, 07:27 PM	#5
saabSean Member Account #: 8108 Join Date: Jul 2000 Posts: 4,434	Sorry for your troubles... ...but that story is HILARIOUS!!! HAHAHAHAHA __________________ AudiWorld \|\| 1999 A6 2.8q \| 1992 100CS \| AudiWorld Photo Gallery Links \|\| Stoney's FAQ \| CycleForums European Sportbikes Forum Tech Articles \|\| Instrument Cluster Replacement \| Suction Pump Replacement Other \|\| boompa.com/audiSean FOR SALE: MOVEN SP-10 18X8.5 FORGED WHEELS, $500 for 5

10-07-2003, 07:32 PM	#6
DWP AudiWorld Super User Account #: 1043 Join Date: Mar 2000 Posts: 5,493	Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! <choking back laughter> But at least now we all know why the stealer charges $65 or more for that! Love your sense of humor, man. You are one great story-teller. __________________ My Audis: 05 A4 Ultrasport 3.0 MT. Silver on ebony leather. Debadged, ClearBra, AMS Short Shifter, MagnaFlows, RS4 Reps, RS4 Rear Sway Bar, 4-ring valve caps, Premium, Bose, Sirius, Warm, Cold, other stuff. 02 2.7T Irish Green Sport Tip Gone but never forgotten 2001 A4 1.8TQM w/ Bilsteins & Vogtland sport springs, TSB, APR Snub, 17" OEM Avus S4's, GIAC Chip, V&S Short Shifter, H-sport bars, APR Cat-back, A8 rotors, clear corners, PIAA Superwhites, sunglass holder mod. '87 4KQ Bone Stock Gone after all these years email:DWPMR@YAHOOdotCOM

10-07-2003, 07:37 PM	#7
CoolerKing New Member Account #: 44597 Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 368	LOL ... Two words for you .. and only you....Jiffy Lube !!! __________________ ....... Cooler King.

10-07-2003, 07:40 PM	#8
screwynewy Junior Member Account #: 11499 Join Date: Oct 2000 Posts: 784	I'm sorry to tell you but I got a great laugh at the expense of your frustration and trouble : ) __________________ (Sold) 2000 A6 4.2 - Upgrades: H-Sport Sways, GIAC TIP Chip, MagnaFlow SS exhaust w/ 3.5" tips, OEM sport suspension upgrade, 18" RS4 wheels w/ 255/35/18 Pirelli Pzero Nero's, M5 spoiler lip, Audi Sport badge. Previous Cars: 97 BMW M3 98 A4 qms 98, 91, & 89 Acura Legend 00 Toyota Tundra P/U 91 Infiniti Q45 85, 89, 96, 98 Honda Accords 89 & 92 Taurus SHO 92 Mazda MX6 88 Volvo 240 Wagon 77 Monte Carlo (first car)

10-07-2003, 08:00 PM	#9
Uncle Castro Elder Member Account #: 57533 Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 14,312	Kudos to you man. I was too embarassed to discuss my first oil change. I can relate to the Exxon Valdez comment. It seems obvious now, but I had my little $8 oil collector bucket right under the plug, thinking it would flow out like Hershey's syrup. Wrong. It'll be easier next time.

10-07-2003, 08:05 PM	#10
RobertV Junior Member Account #: 52500 Join Date: Mar 2003 Posts: 703	Glad nothing happened to you or your baby. I think we all have stories like that. I remember I was cleaning my motorcycle when I was in college. I was wearing only shorts and no shoes. I was drinking a few beers...which is required when you clean your bike! So I go to put the bike on the center stand (it was a Honda NightHawk 750) and it slowly tipped over on the sidewalk. I think I only owned it for about a month and really didn't do much damage, but that was the last time I did it bare foot....never stopped the beers....but I am sure that they really didn't have anything to do with it????? right!!!! REV __________________ REV 06 Magnum SRT8: Trinity 06 Sequoia AKA: The School Bus

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